You are Mary Magdelicious.

So my mom found a picture of me and some of my troll friends from the 4th grade. Mr. MacDonald was my teacher in fourth grade, and all I remember is how BUFF he was for 1. A TEACHER and 2. For an older man. He wore these polo shirts everyday with gray or black pants. Sometimes he would have chalk prints on his bum from absent-mindedly wiping his hands back there after writing something on the chalk board.

So I'm in the picture with my "Olympic" teammates, and we were representing FRANCE. Do you want to know why? Before we formed teams, I told this red-headed girl in front of me that we should make an ISRAEL team. But being the trollish, crusty-eyed chick that she was, she stole my idea. And yes! She was one of those people who always had that "sleep crap" in her eyelashes! UGH! SICK! Do I sound bitter? Maybe. HA!

Anywho, we held olympic-like events in our classroom, and the only medal (a top of a coffee can spray-painted either gold, silver, or bronze) FRANCE won was for BOWLING! So we were awarded with coffe-can tops and we played the French national anthem (which none of us knew the words to, of course. BUT if we had the Israeli anthem....psh!)

I remember my biggest crush during 4th grade was for this dude, Derek. I think my closest friend at that time was a girl named Kaleah. I have yet to encounter another Kaleah in my life. During recess, I went around singing weird songs with this girl, Darla. We also sat by the trees and wrote mysteries. I still have those stories today! I think I wrote about 7 of them. Of course, none of them took over 2 pages in length. I love it.

I remember my gym teacher had frizzy blond hair and had a LOT of freckles. Even her legs were reddish in color and were covered in freckles.

Oh yes! And I remember first seeing a condom in 4th grade. Some high schooler had left a used one on a SWING in the playground. Kaleah's boyfriend at the time had also stolen one, and came up to her and said, "I'm ready when you are" during recess. I'm not too sure if I knew all the details about sex when I was that age, but I knew that a condom WAS involved. HOW FREAKY THAT SEEMS NOW!

Ah well. Anywho, that was my memory-gasm for the day. Hoorah for photos, no? :)