Give up the Ghost

I miss Kyle.

What is it? Is it that I won't settle? This boredom is taking over me. And there are moments when such times feel so familiar. I've lived them. I've lived a life and I've served my time. Its just never enough, is it? It never is.

Its not a rut, I tell myself. Its never being satistfied. Is this a good thing? Is this ultimately dangerous? What am I trying to find, wildly searching through brush and mud? Drums are in my ears. Sweat on my brow.

Difficult to describe.

Is it not feeling whole? Shattered into a million pieces, and I must roam the earth to find every last shard?

At times like this I feel restless.